The Hidden
by Hicari
Summary: Athrun loves kira. He's sure of that. But now that he and Kira can be together after the war, they have to stay hidden. Can Athrun live with that? Athrun's POV, Asukira
1. Chapter 1 The Hidden

**Athrun's POV, in times after the war.**  
**I do not own gundam SEED in any way (Although I wish I did)**  
**Please dont mind bad spelling and other such, this was just a quick thing, and probably not fully edited.**  
**Enjoy**

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**The Hidden**

The sound of the car door didn't wake me from my trance at all, "Miss Murder" playing through my head and a screwdriver in my hand. I was being partially blinded by a desk lamp that was close to my head, so I didn't even notice when he turned the lights on. Or when he walked over. _Or_ when he sighed. I'm not sure, but he might have been there five minutes before I noticed that I wasn't alone. I did notice however, when he said my name loudly.

"Athrun!" I could feel my whole body lift off of the chair as he spoke, his voice catching me by surprise.

"K-Kira…" My words came a bit more surprised sounding than I wanted them to be.

"Idiot." He said the word with a smile lingering on his lips, so I could tell he wasn't mad. He casually linked his arms behind his head and moved so that he was behind me and leaning on my chair. Carefully, he observed the small yellow and green bits of his mechanical pet, which I was currently trying to fix.

"Birdy will be fine Kira. Don't worry about it!" I knew I didn't sound convincing.

"Athy, he's been crashing around the house for a solid week now, and every time you say that it'll be fine, it gets worse!" He sighed heavily and I couldn't help but agree with him. We both know that I've tried my hardest to fix the bird, but I lost all of my blueprints and it was such a long time ago…

I yelp slightly as I shock my hand.

"Not paying attention?" Kira asks me, concerned but amused.

"Shut up Ki. I'd like to see you do better." He shoots me a pout over my comment and stalks into the kitchen, probably to fix supper. It's been about a month now since I moved into this house, the money my parents had left me giving me everything I wanted including a two story wonderland of Athrun. I fiddled with a screw as I thought about it. Both parents dead after the war, Kira's family five minutes away, and all the pizza I could eat. Well maybe not the pizza, but you get it.

Back on that day, the day that everything ended finally, Kira and I had gone to his parent's house. I can remember how Aunty (That's what I always call Kira's mom) was crying; so happy to have Kira back. She was also happy to see us still friends (Heh, she's so sweet) after all of this. I'm kind of surprised too, to tell you the truth. Ya know, after all the fighting and shit.

I fidget with my tools that are lying about on the desk. Come to think of it, that was one of the happiest days of my life. The fighting stopped, I got to see aunty for the first time in years, I felt happy, I was alive and I made out with Kira in the morning.  
Huh? Oh I forgot to mention that didn't I? Well, to put it simply, Kira and I are… sort of secret lovers.

It's a secret 'cause nobody knows about it yet. Minus Ms. Murrue and Mr. Waltfeld anyway. During the fighting I went out with Cagalli on Kira's request, but ditched her later (also on Kira's request). Now Kira and I are 'dating'. Quotations? Well, I don't consider it dating anyway. We haven't gone on a date, don't snuggle in public (or even semi-public) places, and don't even hold hands…though we aren't all that innocent when we're alone together. We are two 18 year old boys that have hormones ya know!

He says he loves me and I believe it. I love him too after all. But he's just super shy in public, that's all. Everything I do is for that boy, which reminds me that this is the second sleepless night trying to fix his bird for him.

The smell of something like pasta floated into the room I'm sitting in, making me smile a little. The boy can also cook. I, on the other hand, could make a profession out of burning water.

Another small electric shock makes me feel like giving up, so I retire into the kitchen where my night in shining amour (or dork wrapped in tinfoil at least) is making noodles with Alfredo sauce in another pan.

"_God_ I love you" the words pass through my lips easily, but the day that I had first told him, it had been a different story.

"Your lucky that I love you back Athy, or you'd starve or get fat." He snickered and stirred some of the creamy sauce in the pan.

"Totally different things there, Ki." I laugh at him quietly, moving so that my arms are linked around his waist lazily, resting on his hips. He leans back into me comfortably, being used to me hugging him at random times now.

Well, you would too if your best friend and you had just survived (not to mention starred in) the war greater than all wars and were on different sides of it almost the whole time. There were days when I swear that I had killed him. Thankfully, he always came back, alive as ever. I think it was about two months before the war ended when I realized how much I loved him. I couldn't stand having to fight against him over and over. I was so glad when I didn't have to anymore.

Instead, we fought on the same side. But even then there was a risk. I thought I had lost him for sure in the last battle, but there he was again; Mr. invincible Kira Yamato. Then came the treaty (the best day of my life) and with it, Kira.

I had fallen asleep in his bed (with him there) because we were both so exhausted. Everyone else went drinking but I was too tired, so I found Kira and crawled in. I'm not sure why I risked that, guess I just wasn't thinking right. It wasn't till he woke me with an unexpected kiss did I tell him how much he meant to me. Surprisingly for me, he returned it (I guess that i should have figured though, he _did_ just kiss me). And that led to more kisses, kisses led to touching, touching led to… well, all I can say is that we both took showers before meeting the Yamatos.

And that leads us up to present day, half snuggling while standing up and making supper. I'm happy that Kira's mother let him come over so often, but I almost wonder sometimes if she would be so willing if she knew…

A shutter passes through me at the thought but Kira either doesn't notice or pretends not to. He knows my mind is weird after all… and he probably thinks I'm getting perverted thoughts or something. Go figure.

I look up to see a knowing smile on his lips

"Thinking about mom?"

I can't help but gape. How does he _do_ that? "Y-ya"

His eyes twinkle a little and he turns in my arms so that he is facing me.

"Your… so _creepy_ when you do that Kira!" I'm still just staring at him as he winks at me and kisses my cheek lightly.

"I just know you." It's funny 'cause I know its true. Kira knows everything about me; right from my favorite book to what turns me on most. He's… observant to say the least.

"Meh…" (That's all I can say to him? Pathetic!)

He giggled and ruffles my hair, turning around and going back to stirring the sauce.

Reluctantly, I let go of him so that he can do it better, after all, I don't want him burning anything because of me. I sit down at the table and begin to read through my mail vaguely. Flyer, flyer, bill, flyer, bill… Something official looking? I stare at it curiously, but toss it aside with the rest as Kira puts a plate down in front of me and sits down in the chair at my side.

"Is it good?" I can see the worry in his eyes.

"Nooooooo" I make sure that my sarcastic tone is easy to pick out.

"I think I messed up on the sauce… it's from scratch…and the noodles-" He is cut of when I shove a forkful into his mouth from my plate. I can't help but laugh at his expression; stunned, messy from the sauce, but still adorable as ever.

I really do love him. But I dont like how we have to stay hidden all the time..

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**End of the first chapter! I hope you liked it. More to be written soon, please leave a review!**


	2. Chapter 2: One Week

**Its late yawn  
So, I wrote the first couple sentences on my school bus (on paper) and then stopped, thinking that I've lost my touch. And then I sat down tonight and typed this.. Ur.. stuff.. out and ya. Sorry if its not all that grand, I managed to do this within the hour, and I'm sure its not well edited. My editing skills are crap.  
Thanks to everyone that left a review or a note, and a SUPER thanks to the people watching this story.  
_I LOVE YOUUUUU  
_I do not Own anything Gundam, although if I did, Kira and Athrun would be sexing it up by now :p  
Have fun and enjoy my asukira-ness. **

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**Chapter 2: One week**

The food was delicious, and I just can't get over how nervous he was about it. It must have been the cutest thing that I've ever seen.

My fingers are wrinkly from the water and soap that cover them. A cloth in one hand and a dish in my other, I glance over to my brown haired companion. I can't help but grin at his expression as I do so. He is observing me in this way that I'm sure only Kira can do, eyes sparkling, looking into my own. Lips half parted in almost a curious way, a way that makes me want to capture them with my own and never let them go.

A content sigh escaped me as I just gaze at him. Perfection lies behind those purple orbs, I swear.

"You're staring." He surprises me as he said those words and I realize that I was in fact staring, daydreaming about him as usual. It hits me that a few minutes have passed. Quickly regaining my composure, I try to make it look as if it was his fault.

"You were staring first, need I remind you. I was merely returning the favor."

"Was not." A blush creeps across his face.

"Denial..." I stick out my tongue in a playful way.

I'm not sure how it happened, but my back was against the wall in no time. Kira must have pushed me there, for he was right up against my chest and somehow had his fingers laced with mine and above my head.

I was perplexed to say the least. Stunned silence surrounded me, and then I heard, or felt rather, his breath against my neck. Warm, moist, quick. His breath had sped up, as did his heart beat (That I could now hear). I tried to crane my neck to see just was he was planning, and I was greeted by a smirk. What was up with this boy? He was normally the submissive one…

A tongue ran from the base of my neck to just under my ear and I could feel the shutter go down my spine, my head tilting slightly so that he could get at more of my skin.

His lips moved across my neck and to my earlobe, which he nipped at slightly. I have to say, it was a new experience, He was being bold and I rather enjoyed it. Another nip made me shutter again and my back arched into him. He murmured something, but I was enjoying this too much to really take any notice as to what it was.

He moved me, getting me so that I was leaning over backwards on a table, his hands, surprisingly, keeping me there firmly.

"What are you doing Kira?" I hadn't realized until I tried to speak that my breath had also sped up slightly.

"Playing" I liked that response. Playing was always a good thing, unless he decided to have a little bit of evil fun and just leave me there after he got me going.

I mumbled a bit of nonsense in almost encouragement and his tongue traveled down my skin again, causing the same reaction- my back arching into his stomach. He was so close, and I loved it.

He shifted on the table that he was pinning me too, probably to find another sensitive piece of skin. But I never found out just what he was planning, as he accidentally knocked the papers I had been going through earlier onto the floor. The landed with a slight thud and then a rustle as they scattered, as papers were prone to do when they fell.

Looking at the mess, Kira uttered a light profanity under his breath before un-pinning me and getting off of the table. I didn't say anything as I followed him to clean up the mess of papers, but there were much harsher words then he had used going through my head. My thoughts were rather whiny as they circled about my head. I wanted more of that...

Kira hated messes, and I guess that's one of the thousands of reasons why I had always thought of him as the feminine one in our relationship. But hopefully he would show that rare dominant side that I had just seen a few seconds ago sometime soon? This thought made me smile as I helped him pick up flyer after flyer off of the floor.

My happy thoughts were interrupted by Mr. Usually-submissive as he shoved the letter that I had been looking at before supper in my face.

"What's this?" He had an eyebrow raised and was sitting back on his heels as he showed me the letter. Back to cute and childish in a flash, as if that was some other personality that had taken over.

"How would I know? I just got it this morning and haven't had a chance to read it." I cant help but smile as he moves to sit sits crossed-legged on the floor and begins to open it

"well, I hope its nothing too personal" The tone of his voice clearly states that he could care less even if it _**was **_something highly personal. He was going to read it anyway.

He ripped the paper slowly open, taking extra care not to rip anything that was inside of it.

"Mr. Athrun Zala," He read, making his voice sound a bit deeper and more official sounding. I couldn't help but chuckle at him as he continued.

"You have been invited to a special awards ceremony for our most celebrated heroes. The date of the event will be February twelfth and you will be expected to arrive in military attire as you are receiving several awards, including one for bravery and commanding abilities."

Kira made a face and cleared his throat. "You will also be receiving a special memorial plaque in memory of the late Mr. Patrick Zala that is additional to a larger memorial that is under construction in the PLANTS."

I sighed as I listened to him read the rest of the letter describing the location and so on and so forth. Simply put, I hated anything to do with remembering the war, and that included award ceremonies. I suddenly catch something that was stated earlier.

"February 12th?" Kira nodded a little bit to confirm that bit of information from the letter. It was so close to the anniversary of my mother's death… I check the calendar. One week till the specified date. I had one week till I had to suffer through that.

I look up into Kira's eyes and he looks worried. He understands me so well. He knows that I would rather have a venomous snake shoved down my pants than to go to some place where they make me look important for hours. Especially if I have my mom on the brain, as I'm prone to do near Valentine's day.

We both sigh at the same time and he crawls over to put an arm around me. I lean my head into his shoulder and smile to show him that everything is alright. I don't know _**why**_ something feels so wrong, but we can both feel it. It's as if the atmosphere changed in the kitchen when he read the letter.

One week...

February twelfth...

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**Bwahah. Yes, the official looking letter was a notification of awards ceremony. More to come later, and I'm horribly slow due to school, friends, dates, and passing out down flights of stairs.  
hahahaha. Athrun likes being submissive XD  
Please leave a review- I love your comments (They're what got me to write this)**


	3. Chapter 3: Soldier of zaft

**Another one  
****Sorry for not posting this last night like I was going to, things came up and my boyfriend sneaked over :D  
Im not 100 pleased with it, But it'll do  
Again, sorry for the bad editing.  
Nothing SEED (like my Kira and Athy) is mine and I cry at night because of it. You would too.  
Thanks again to my commenters, I love you more than you know.  
Enjoy**

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**Chapter 3: Soldier Of Zaft**

Kira led me over to a couch, and moved onto it first before pulling me into his lap. I happily leaned my back against his chest, and he leaned against the arm of the couch.

It has been a few days now, since Kira and I opened that letter. In fact, its almost been a week. I shoot a glance at a wall calendar that I can just barely see from the couch. I know the date, but it's been like a habit to glance at it every two minutes now, ever since I wrote 'DEATH' in black marker in the square for the twelfth.

It's the 11th. I had only a few short hours of freedom before I had to go. 13 hours to be exact. The ceremony starts at 11:30AM tomorrow, and its 10:30PM right now.

I must be getting a bit jumpy at this thought, because his hand shocks me as it begins to run through my hair.

"Long, blue, soft, fun..." I can't help but snicker as he describes my hair in a few words, although the point of it totally evades me.

"Annoying," I add onto his list, and then continue as he gets a confused look on his face.

"It never works the way I want it to. It flips in my face all the time and gets messed up in the morning…"

He laughs at me- hysterically. And I can't blame him. Don't you hate it when you say something that gives someone a reason to mock you?

I groan as his laughter continues, and try to hide my face unsuccessfully. His hands are so soft as they tilt my head up after his laugher dies down and I barely register when he leans his head towards me. I practically lose all my senses as he places a soft kiss on my lips and then another on the tip of my nose. He has this smirk on his face and I can tell he isn't thinking about my girly comment anymore.

"What's up?" I inquire softly, my voice emitting only inches away from his face.

"Thinking about earlier this week." He purrs softly and the flash in his eyes let me know _exactly _what he means by that.

I can't feel my face hear up with a vivid blush as I recall Kira's outburst of lust from just a few days before. God, who knew Kira, could be so….so….well, so damn sexy.

Of all the time we've been together (like this _and_ as little kids) Kira was just the naturally more girly one. More submissive if you will. I really never expected anything different from him.

I close my eyes and try to will my blush on my face from growing. I was fine with being the submissive one if that's what Kira would be like as the dominant one.

"You look tired." He mumbles into my ear, before lightly nibbling on the lobe. "Maybe you should sleep?" he then proceeds to move down my neck, his tongue trailing down my skin.

I let out a rather pathetic, only slightly audible noise of enjoyment before I manage to shake my head. I'm fine if _this_ is what he wants to do! I then tilt my head subconsciously so that he could reach my skin easier.

"Mmm…Kira…" I can feel his tongue swirl around to my shoulder before he begins to gently bite my collar bone.

At this, I let out a small gasp, just to add on to my already apparent pathetic-ness. He chuckled from my collar bone and began to playfully bite along it.

I can't quite describe the feeling. Pain, but pleasure at the same time. My head tilts back on its own accord and I quickly stifle the moan that I'm sure Kira would comment on, or laugh at me for. He lifts his head slightly, and I can see a smirk that lets me instantly know he heard it. The smirk doesn't last long, however, as he is back at my neck and shoulder, biting first in small nips, then as if he was a vampire, before going back to gentle nibbling.

Minutes went by, and I was in a complete dazed state of mind, purring at every bite, and letting the occasional small moan escape my lips. Kira also seemed to be enjoying himself- that is until he randomly and abruptly stopped.

I moved so that I could see what he was doing. He had this look on his face like he was worried, and he was biting his lip slightly. The latter of Kira's actions made me want to rape him and his unintentional cuteness, but I refrained to see what the matter was.

"Uhoh,"

Uhoh? Uhoh?!? That's not good. When Kira says uhoh, you know something is bad.  
I didn't reply, just looked at him curiously until he continued on.

"I…err…" he looked to my neck and I tried to crane it to also see, but couldn't,  
"I…" he repeated "I'm sorry Athy...I...Ur…left a…Err...mark."

That's all? I tried to think of how that could really be a _bad_ thing. I mean, I could always cover it up with a turtle neck or something. So, depending on where this apparent 'mark' (AKA love bite) was, I could just as easily hide it.  
Then it dawned on me. The ceremony. I would have to have to wear the Zaft uniform, right? Right. They have high necks, right? Right.

Relief washed through me again. I looked over at Kira then, after my abandoning him for my shot lived mental panic attack. He looked so apologetic. I smiled a bit.

"Don't worry Kira," I smiled a little more "I'm sure no one will be like… looking straight at my neck or anything. And I'm going to try my best at covering it up, so chill."  
This seemed to put him slightly at ease but he does not continue (Damn him for that). Instead, he reaches for the remote and begins to watch some show about cops. I don't know, its Kira. He likes weird drama shows.

_-Time Jump-_

The buzzer on my bedside table wakes me from a dream I was having. Groggily, I reach over to turn it off and Kira makes a noise when I, as a result of reaching over him to complete my task, wake him up.

Another groan sort of noise comes from him and he moves to snuggle up to me, only to find that I am no longer there. I had moved off of the bed and am now putting on clean clothing. He sits up, and oddly enough, watches me.

"It's nine thirty." He states after a moment.

"Good job. Way to state the obvious, Mr. Yamato." I smirk

"I'm tired." He yawns as if to prove this.

"I can tell. Wouldn't have anything to do with what happened after we went to bed, would it?"

"Nnnnnhg…" I can't really understand his answer, but he smiles none the less, and flops onto his back. I can tell he's reminiscing, probably over what he called 'play time' that took place last night.

My eyes roll, but I can't help but to smile. I am also a little tired because of it, but I shouldn't really be complaining.

Going to my attached bathroom, I begin combing my hair and putting on the rest of the red uniform that I had to wear for so long before the war ended. It still fit as it had in the war- I must not have gained any weight since. Doing up the collar, I'm relieved that it covers the love bite.

I take a step back and sigh. This is who I was, this is who they'll know me as, and this is who they want me to be

Athrun Zala, soldier of Zaft.

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**Thanks for reading, please review  
Heh, ya... Next chapter might be soon, might not be for a while. I wasn't all that pleased with the outcome of this one.  
And.. hehehe. The time jump MIGHT be written in like.. a side story or something (Yay lemon?) Heh.  
So ya, thanks again!!**


	4. Chapter 4: Called You

**ITS HERE!  
Gah, that took too long! Hahaha.  
So, I'm _SUPERLY NOT HAPPY WITH THIS CHAPTERR_, their becomming rather painful to write. Hopefully the next wont be so hard. lol.  
For the chairman's name, sorry. I have NO clue as to how to spell that, and i got something different every time i looked for it...  
SO I MADE IT UP.  
bwahahar.**

**I don't own any one of my little Gundam dollies. (-smooshes them all together in a giant orgy of gundam boys-) I think we can all imagine what would happen if I got the rights. :D  
But for now, the rights go to their creator peoples. Respectively :)**

**Enjoy, sorry about the spelling, and the other mistakes that may anoy you. I swear I try my best.. XP**

**PS: If you want to check out my art that I do randomly, you can swing by my deviantart account,  
(animeluver16.deviantart. com )  
and all of its un-glory that is my drawings.  
toodles!!**

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**Chapter 4: Called You**

The hallway was…grander, I suppose…than I had expected it to be. My eyes kept looking at things around the hall that I swear I didn't tell them to. In fact, I didn't have control over much of what I did in this current worried state of mind. Kira was walking beside me, wearing what I would have to say is something between civilian and formal clothing.

He looked almost scared from what I could see in my peripheral vision, his eyes roaming over to me every two seconds. Finding all of my will power, I manage not to look at him- instead, looking towards the floor. I'm not even sure why I'm so determined not to look at Kira…I guess I just think that it would make the mess in my mind worse or something. It probably would too, he would just worry over me if he was to see what I was thinking (and he would somehow see that for sure, he has super powers **I swear**).

A door looms ahead of me and I take a deep breath to steady myself. This is it; don't make yourself look like an idiot. Both of us pause in front of the door, before Kira is brave enough to open it for me.

"Oh! Shit-face is here!" Yzak is staring at me, Dearka looming behind him. It's been so long since I last saw them, but yet nothing has changed, physically at least. Dearka, however, looks a bit sad or shy or something (I decide to wait until later to ask about that). Yzak on the other hand, is beaming.

"like a little kid on Christmas..." I can't help but mumble to myself as I note his expression. "Something special going on here Jule?"

He laughs and hugs me. Yeah, I know. **HUGS ME. **I think I just mentally pissed myself.

"I beat you!" the smile on his face grows (If possible).

"beat me? What?" I raise an eyebrow and almost smirk.

Yzak, since we were in school, had always tried to win at everything. Personally, I could care less who 'won' in this constant battle for greatness, but he seemed to have made it his life's goal. Unfortunately, he always ended up coming in second, no matter what. Marks in school, chess, ranks, who got the girl first, you name it; he was always one step behind the best- me.

Yzak nodded energetically from his new position of only a foot away "I'm getting more than you!"

"Sex." Dearka's voice joins in and we both turn to him, half stunned.

"What?" Both of us answer him at the same time.

"Where?" Kira mumbles sarcastically from the door, half laughing at our stupidity. "I'm gone to sit down Athrun. See ya after the…Yeah. See ya." He waves a bit before turning and closing the door on his way out. No sooner had he done this than our attention was back on Dearka, who was grinning.

"Sex." He repeated "intercourse, the act of mat-" He was cut off by Yzak."Ya, jackass, we know what the fuck sex is. Why the hell did you say it?"

"Well, you said to Athrun that, and I quote, your 'getting more'" he put air-quotes around the last two words. "And that could mean sex. Not awards."

The platinum blond was already in the process of running his hand down his face.  
"Dearka… that was the most…mot…immature thing you could have **ever** said at that moment. Save it for the hotel would you, were in an important place here."

I couldn't help but to laugh. Me, being sick minded and all, took that as to save the **sex **for the hotel that they were staying in. I got a hard smack from Yzak for that; he must have been thinking the same thing. I couldn't help but wonder why his mind went to that too. Ow, he hit on the bit too. Good aim, if only he knew.

A man, in uniform came into the room via another door than Kira and I had used, telling us to get ready to go and briefly explaining how we were to stand as we received our awards (and the various other shits). He then proceeded to escort us out. I was slightly surprised at the amount of people in the room. We were on sort of a low stage and we stood in kind of a diagonal line on one side, saluting a new chairman that was taking over for dad. This was the first time I saw him for some reason, and I almost debated over his gender for a moment. Gilbert Durandall (the chairman) silently told us to be at ease and I dropped my hand. The ceremony had begun.

--Time Jump--

"Your turn." Yzak's words were slightly slurred and a bit of amber liquid sloshed out of his glass as he sloppily placed it onto the table.

"Right…" The game we were paying was 'Called You Out', something I think we created one day. Each person has a glass of alcohol, and we take turns going around the circle asking 'truth' questions. Usually dirty. If you answered the truth, you were safe. But, you **could** lie about it. If someone says 'I call you out' when you lie, you have to admit it, tell the real truth, and drink. But if you're telling the truth and they call it, **they **drink. Get it? It sounds stupid, but it's a conversation starter for sure, and we call each other out even if we know it's a truth sometimes; just for kicks (And hey, anything is fun when your drunk!)

Dearka turns to me then, staring into my eyes in a sort of creepy way that one can only do while drunk. "Zala…" I raise an eyebrow "Ever kiss…A **boy**?"

The question stuns me slightly and my half drunk mind goes into a frenzy. Thank god Kira didn't come back to Yzak and Dearka's hotel room with us. He would probably either blush like mad or hit me if I lied or something (He really can't hold his alcohol well, so I can only assume that he would do something stupid). The room swam in front of me as I tried to concentrate on the answer that I **should** say. Okay, I know I can do this, just a simple 'no' will do.

"Nope." Shit, that took too long, didn't it?

"CALLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!" Yzak flails a little bit and hits the floor with one hand as if it were a buzzer on some game show. "I….." He seems to loose emphasis for a moment, but it comes back and his eyes re-focus. "…….Call!!" Fuck, he's wasted.

"Why?" Dearka is almost giggling at Yzak now and his enthusiastic movements. "He said no; I believe that. He's straight. Don't you remember how many girls he stole from you back in the good old days?"

"Three." I add in my defense. Dearka is now my best friend for coming to my rescue. I was sure I was going to die there for a moment.

"No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no …no." Yzak shakes his head a bit too violently it seems, because he falls over so that he is lying on the bed. "**God**, Ass-ran. 'member that time? Huh? **That** time?"

What time was this? I close my eyes and try to think if he ever saw Kira and I by accident or...- My thoughts cut out as I come to what he's thinking of. Unfortunately, he says it out loud before I can even glare at him for remembering.

"Ya know, that time, when I gave you that booze and you were, like, druuuuuuuuunk!!" He makes hand gestures that remind me a bit of Jack Sparrow. "You kissed meeeeee."

How did I know he would turn that around? **He** forced himself on **me**. Not the other way around. But unfortunately, I didn't even attempt to reject him or stop him or anything. What? I was feeling lonely as hell! And he was there, and kissing me, and shirtless, and…**NO**! I swore that I would never think of that again!

I quickly try and erase that night from my head (yet again) and look up to see Dearka glancing, stunned, between the two of us.

"Dude. Ew…" He takes a swing from his glass for no reason (probably to forget what he just heard), and I do the same. Yzak just laughs, what an ass. Ah well, at least he doesn't know that he's not the only guy I've kissed.

Suddenly, Dearka wobbles. I'm expecting him to pass out and fall right off the bed, so (by reflex) I try and make sure he doesn't end up falling. There's just one thing I forgot- my glass is still in my hand. The contents of it end up o my jacket. Dearka sits up, smiles at me broadly and pats my shoulder, also forgetting about the glass in **his** hand- which also ends up on my uniform.

My mind is a little foggy, as is my vision at this point, but I can see him getting closer to me. One thought- 'oh shit, he's going to rape me.'.

"Silly us!" Dearka giggles a little "Lets see now…" He undoes the snaps and the zippers of my uniform jacket and takes it off of me. My mind is pretty much not working, so I don't bother trying to stop him.

Its only until he's giggling like a school girl and has a finger pointed at my neck and shoulder do I realize my mistake. I have one of those plain shirts under my jacket as always, but the collar of it still reveals the wonderful mark that Kira so generously left on my flesh.

"so, who was it Mr. Athrun Zala? Hmm? A lover that we didn't get told about?" Dearka's words are laced with his giggles. I try to get a grip on the spinney place that I like to call my mind, try to get out the words 'No one that you know' or even just 'no' if that's too hard. Okay, I can do this….

"K-……" shit shit shit shit. Fuck. I'm screwed.

"Cagalli?! Aw, lucky man! I heard she was good in bed! The rumor true then?" This time it was Yzak's turn to be my best friend. I now love how 'K' and 'C' have the same sound. Love, love, love…love……..love………………………love…

The darkness closes in on me quickly, and I can only half feel myself as I hit the floor, but I'm still semi-conscious. Someone picks me up and lays me on a bed. Kira? No, he's not here… Yzak, it's that idiot. Oh well, the bed he puts me on is comfy. Happily, I close my eyes and drift into a sort of drunken sleep. There were a few close calls tonight, but thank god for drunken friends, they probably won't even ask in the morning.

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**And hopefully it wont be as long of a wait for the next chaper, im curreently attempting to write/type it out now!  
I hope you enjoyed the chaper, please please PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEE leave a little review or respond or something, i'll love you forever.**

**No, seriously. DO IT. Haha.  
_LOTS OF LOVE_,  
-kitty-**


	5. Chapter 5: Too Fast

_**What did kitty do? She rote you another chapter! Yay!  
just something I wrote up in a night and typed without my glasses on (so spelling mistakes are probable) :)**_

_**--I do not own the boys, but I still like to think I can do whatever I want to with them. I like to dress them up and take them out for tea parties. I think they secretly like that though, because Kira giggles the whole time, and Athrun gives Kira the EVILEST look when he doesn't get to wear the pink dress (but the blue DOES look good on him...)--**_

_**Hehehe, enjoy. New chapter to come soon, I've already started on it and actually have the time to finish it now.**_

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The rays flowing through the window danced across my eyelids and encouraged them to open. It took me only a moment to get used to the light, and I surveyed my surroundings as the drunken memories came back to me. So close. It had been so fucking close, **too **close. I silently thanked whatever gods I could think of for letting me escape that one. A light snore came to my attention and the owner of it -a tanned skinned blond- rolled over in his sleep. I couldn't help but notice how close Dearka's face was to Yzak's and the thought made me want to laugh. However close friends Dearka and Yzak were, it had nothing compared to Kira and I. Especially since I knew for a genuine fact that those two could never actually date. Ever. Even if they did have some secret feelings for each other or something.

Taking a deep breath in, I slipped out of the bed I had been placed into last night and looked down at myself to see that (thankfully) all of my clothing was still on me. Well, minus my uniform jacket. I walked over to the bathroom and splashed my face with cold water before looking up into my reflection. Somehow, I always felt weird doing that; as if the face I was looking into wasn't really me, or if it was, it was so different from what I used to see. Me eyes seemed to be the most different from when I was a child –they seemed to have hardened or something over time, and I blamed the war. Its no surprise really that my eyes had changed. I mean, I've seen so many people die and most of them were by my own hands. A shutter ran through me at the thoughts of the past war. Not only had I seen so many people die, bit I also had escaped death many times. Weird, what could happen in just a few short years. Stretching, I walked out of the bathroom and silently gathered my things before stepping out of the hotel room without waking anyone.

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**TIME JUMP**_**  
**_

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"You have to be kidding me!" Kira's eyes were wide and his eyebrows were raised high enough so that they hid in his bangs.

"Well I didn't want to wake you up, so I thought a cab was the best way to get home. I **did **have the money on me." The sheepish grin was still plastered to my face.

"Yeah, all two-freaking-hundred of it!"

"One sixty," I corrected him, before handing him two dimes "And eighty cents"

He didn't reply, instead, rolling his eyes and stepping away from the door so that I could come inside. I think I had been standing there for about fifteen minutes before he did this, trying to charm my way out of trouble while telling him how I had gotten back home from the hotel (about a two hour drive). Kira, apparently, had been at my house over night once he drove himself home, and was waiting for my call to pick me up. Something he should have known I would never do so early in the morning. Presently, I could see he was in the kitchen, pouring himself a large cup of coffee while muttering things under his breath.

"Baaaaaby" I liked to mockingly call him that all the time because I knew it bugged him a little. "There was no harm done, really. It was just a hundred dollars. Nothing huge…"

"Your price keeps going down Athy." I could see his eye twitch from the use of the feminine pet name, but he chose to not say anything on it. "And 100 is still a lot. For us normal people anyway."

"But you know I do love you." I smiled and jokingly batted my eyelashes, making him snort into his coffee.

"Athy!!" I grabbed the cloth before he could and wiped the surprisingly cold liquid off of his face.

"Ew. Cold coffee?" Changing the subject is my specialty.

"I **like **it cold." He pouted, and I could tell he was going to go back to the previous topic. Cutting him off before he even started, I placed a light kiss on his lips which he returned with a purr.

"Forgiven?" My lips were inches from his now.

"Forgiven…" Kira did his famous eye-roll, but still smiled.

"Now get some normal, hot coffee." I smirked a little.

"Too lazy"

"I'll make it."

"It'll take too long."

"Then lets go to Starbucks."

"You want us to **drive** to Starbucks after you just spent **two** hours and **two hundred **dollars in a cab?!" The disbelief in his voice was amusing in itself; not to mention his stance with his hands on his hips. He had backed up a step or two away from me now.

"I wanna drive Ki. Being in a stuffy old car for hours isn't as much fun." I threw him puppy dog eyes.

"Fine then." Another sigh and another eye-roll, but he did say that it was okay. Part of me wondered why he was so forgiving or something today. Kira usually held these sort of things for a while and almost never gave into what I wanted without a lot of convincing first. I brushed it out of my mind as I climbed the stairs to my room, needing to change into some normal clothing. My clothes still smelled strongly of alcohol and that had almost gotten me into trouble with the cab driver earlier.

I slipped on a pair of jeans, a red shirt, and a black sweater before going back downstairs. Kira hadn't changed; but instead had added a black collar to his outfit, something that made me snicker.

"What?" His tone was so innocent.

"Nothing." I closed the door behind us and slipped the key into the lock.

"It's not nothing Athrun. You're laughing at me…why?"

"You're just adorable, that's all." I smirked and slipped into the driver's seat of my black convertible as he sat down in the passenger's side and did up his seat belt.

"surrrre.." again, he was all too quick to drop it. I decided not to ask for the moment, though I did make a mental note to bring it up later.

_Maybe something was wrong? Or what if was something important on his mind? What if he was thinking of breaking up with me? And why? What if he was secretly angry?_

I backed out of the driveway and started down the road, still thinking. Kira didn't notice the worried look that was sure was on my face as I thought, instead, looking out the front window in a blank stare. He was thinking too?

"You're driving too fast." His eyes didn't move from their spot as he spoke, but he still decided I was speeding.

"So?" I smirked and shook my head. I always drove faster than Kira, and he knows it well. I know it's not a good thing, but I never seem to be able to drive the speed limit. It just feels too slow. I like to feel the wind and the power as I drive faster than I should; it's like an adrenaline rush. To prove my point, I sped up a little bit more. He makes a face and a sort of grunt noise as I do, but doesn't say anything as my foot gives the pedal a little bit more pressure. It takes him about three minutes to finally speak.

"Athrun…" He looked worried. "If this is your way of coping…" My mind goes into a whirl. Coping with what? That must really mean that there is something going on behind his eyes. I take my eyes from the road to look at him for a moment.

"What?" I decide to ask, but I'm afraid of the answer he might give me. I can just tell that it's going to be something bad. I prayed to God that he wouldn't be breaking up with me…I didn't do something **that** bad, did I?

"What do you mean 'what?' Don't you even…Athrun, slow down, that's a red light." I could feel his eyes on me, and could tell he was worried, something big must be up. Looking up at the light, I could tell that it had just changed yellow. I could make it if I went just a **little**bit faster…"Athrun! I said slow down, not speed up!" he sounded irritated, but I'm not sure I even registered what he said. My head was too cluttered with thoughts of what could be on **his** mind. The light turned red before I got to it, I but honestly didn't notice or care.

"Athrun!" Kira's voice sounded panicked.

"Kira, its fine, don't worr-" The sound that came next cut me off, along with the jolt of the car and the airbag inflating into my face. As I went through the red light, a car that had been coming from the right smashed into the side of us…the side…the passenger's side. Kira's side. I knew I was hurt; I could feel the blood gumming my left eye closed and a cut on my head was throbbing. But somehow, all of that didn't seem to matter. Kira. Kira mattered.

I couldn't take my eyes off of him… his head was covered in blood and rolled back, his clothes were much the same and torn where pieces of glass and metal pierced through them and into his flesh, and his eyes…his eyes were open in a blank stare.

My voice had left me, I could barely breathe. Was he…dead? I felt like I couldn't move, possibly out of shock and possibly because I might have a few broken bones.

"Kira…" When it did come back, the sound of my voice was only just over a whisper. "Kira...say something, please…Kira..? Kira! KIRA!"

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_**OMG I left you hanging. How mean is THAT? haha. Please forgive me.  
Bug me enough and the chapter will come sooner than I thought.  
Again thank you for reading, and PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE review!!**_

_**...PLEASE...**_

_**PS: Reflection Of nothing chapter 2 will be done soon also, and G Weapon should get another chapter maybe before that, as that just needs some edits. Thanks again for reading**_

_**I love you all :D**_


	6. Chapter 6: Beep Beep Beep

**I DID IT.  
Sorry it took me so long though. And even longer to post….they seem to have done something to the site and now I really don't know how to edit them right on the site before I post 0-o  
but I think that's just me being a little bit un-computer-savvy.  
I don't own anything Gundam related and I don't make money from this fiction. GAWD, if I made money I would be a happy little kitty and probably write more though :D  
enjoy~**

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I could hear the woman's voice shake as she answered questions to whoever was on her phone. A paramedic perhaps? Yes, she was calling for an ambulance. She had been the woman in the other car, and had taken it on herself to call for help. Previously, she had gotten out of her car (unharmed I guess), caught sight of us and had quickly found her phone. I'm glad she did this, as I really didn't want to move right yet. Movement caught my eye and I would have jumped had it not hurt so much.

"Fuck…" Kira's voice was near silent, it was a wonder I could hear him over the quickly approaching sirens. "If I don't die, you will"  
My eyes filled with tears and I nodded so much it hurt.  
"Anything Kira. Anything, just please don't die."  
"I Won't."  
"You don't kno-"  
"I won't." Even though his words were quieter than mine, he still cut me off and I nodded again.

They took Kira away first, three people moving him onto a stretcher sort of thing before loading him into the back of an ambulance. I'm not sure how the three people moved him like that; barely moving his body, but getting him to the vehicle so fast.

It left and another one approached where I sat. Suddenly everything seemed overloud and blurry…all just too much for me. My head throbbed and I begged the sounds to stop.  
"Go away…please…stop it... oh god, stop…"  
Everything was turning red, and so cold. I felt like my insides were freezing over.  
"Take it away..." I couldn't hear my moans of pain over the too-loud sirens anymore. It all seemed too close, when just moments ago it was so far away. "Stop it all!"

I must have been screaming because I felt a hand go over my mouth. No... not a hand…warm air being forced into my lungs. A mask? Air…breathing…  
"Just keep breathing," A ladies voice to me and then "Looks 20 or something, probably showing off." I wanted to tell her it was all an accident, I waned to yell at her, but I couldn't move. At least the pain was going away… but still, so cold and red. Blackness?  
There is a warmth there…I see warmth in the black…let everything fade to black…

Beep. Beep. Beep.  
My body feels like lead, but there is no more pain.  
Beep. Beep. Beep.  
What the fuck is that anyway?  
Beep. Beep. Beep.  
My…heart? Yes, that's me. Its telling me that im alive…  
Beep. Beep. Beep.

My eyes have a hard time opening, but I force them to. I have to see this, I have to know I'm real. The white ceiling stares back down at me; a few heart-shaped balloons strung from a hook are balanced on it. My eyes move side to side at the discovery that my head cant, and I realize where I am. A hospital bed. Right.. the car. The crash. Kira…  
An image of him half dead floats behind my eyes and I let out a strangled gasp. "Kira!"

"Yeah, you almost killed him. Nice job Zala." Yzak's familiar drawl hits my ears and makes me jump. He's sitting in a chair to my right, platinum hair messier than usual and a red rim around his eyes….was he crying earlier?  
"What the hell…?" My voice is still weak sounding, but at least it doesn't hurt now. Instinctively, I try to get up but his hands stop me surprisingly gently.

"No. Yamato's fine, he woke up about an hour ago. His chest is a bit torn up and the side of his face and arm are scratched up too, but he's okay. Worry about yourself for a minute Athrun. Your head is in pretty rough shape." He sighed and slowly tucked me in again. I'm sure I would have questioned him had I not been so relieved but why was he, of all people, worried about me? On second thought, he seemed to have something else on his mind…

I became aware of the bandages that were wound around my forehead and one around my arm where an IV poked out of my skin. So…we were both alive.

"What a day to try and kill yourself asshole. As if it wasn't bad enough for everyone already." My confused look made him have to explain. "Valentines."  
That one word made my hear sink lower than it had in a long time, and I could feel sudden tears spring to my eyes and roll down my face before I could stop them. What a day indeed.

His hands treated me like I was glass as they brushed tears away from my face and moved my bangs out of my eyes, but his touch contrasted his tone.  
"Suck it up." Even as he said this, a soft pitying smile came over his lips. He was acting so weird today. "Get some rest Athrun. Its okay right now, everyone will be okay."

As if his words were law to my eyes, they started to feel heavy and close. An involuntary sigh escaped my lips as I drifted off into dreamland, suddenly overcome by fatigue. He was right; this would all be okay soon. Kira and I would get better, and if I'm lucky I could sleep all of this horrid day away.

Just before I was completely gone, I suddenly realized what Kira had been talking about. He had been worried about me all along and had thought that _**my**_ peculiar behavior could be because of my mother... it made sense. A smile formed on my lips and I fell asleep for the second time today.

---------------------------------

Again the beeping woke my up. This time, however, it seemed to me steadier and I let out a relieved sigh as I noticed this. My eyes tried to find Yzak, but instead found a lady with short black hair.

"oh your awake." She had a warm smile and I instantly knew that she was a nurse. "sorry to do this to you so soon, but can you tell me what you remember? You hit your head pretty hard…" She was young, probably new.  
"Um... " My brain had to work twice as head to think back, but I told her briefly what I remembered. The results of this seemed to please her, and in turn made me happy. "-and then I think I fell asleep with my friend here…"  
"Yes, he left yesterday. In total this is about your third day here."

I could feel my mouth hanging open a bit more than I thought I could in my current state.  
"_**Three**_ days?!? I've been out for _**three whole days**_ and...and..." My voice faltered and broke, so I closed my moth to stop it.

"Oh, no, no, don't panic." Her smiled seemed sickly sweet combined with her sugary tone. Suddenly, all I wanted to do is shut her up with a punch, or to yell at her until I couldn't talk anymore. How in the hell did she expect me not to panic?!?!? The happiness that I felt only seconds ago faded from me and I shook my head, becoming aware of the tears that were forming in my eyes.

Quickly, she attempted to change the topic. "I bet you're hungry. I brought some food with me on a tray and the doctor told me to see if you would eat it… you _**are**_ hungry right?" My stomach did the talking with a large growl and she giggled a bit before helping me to sit up. My whole body felt stiff and heavy, but the pain wasn't nearly as bad as it had been yesterday…or whenever that was I guess.

I've never liked hospital food (on the occasions that I have eaten it), and this time was no exception to that. Everything tasted like it had been made almost a week ago, and the amount of salt that greeted my tongue with every bite made me want to gag.

Once the nurse was satisfied that I was eating, she left after checking whatever statistics there were to check on me. The room returned to its usual (and almost eerie) silence with her departure and I felt like I should hold my breath to keep from breaking it. Only deciding that wouldn't be the best for me right now, however, prevented me from doing so.

Hours passed in the same silence (minus the beeping that I already learned to tune out) until I could hear her voice again. She was coming towards my room and talking quietly to someone who didn't seem to be responding, or at least not loud enough for me to hear through the door anyway.

"Here we are." She was standing outside of my closed door now and my eyes moved to it just as I heard it open. She was smiling at me and holding the handles of a wheelchair, Kira sitting there and looking better than I remembered him from in the car. Sure, he was covered in bandages and his smile was weak, but his eyes were locked with mine and I could tell that he was alive.

"Kira…" a smile lit my face and my eyes didn't move from his. I felt like if I blinked or looked away, everything would just disappear, as if Kira was some vision I had made up. She wheeled him over to my bed and he whispered my name back to me.  
"Everything will be okay now Athrun."  
It seems like everyone had been saying that, but now, for the first time in almost three days, did I believe it.

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**Hope you liked it, and please don't forget to put your lovely comments/reviews to help me keep writing!  
(Seriously, they do help a ton!)  
Love you all!**


	7. Chapter 7: Cough

**Ah, I've been gone away from fanfiction for so long that I didn't notice how much things have changed.  
1) I can't write anymore, but I will try my best to please you all. So, with that said, I'll still keep writing, even though I can't.  
2) Um… the preview thingy is gone. I guess I just have to rely on fanfiction to get my pages right? Ha, as if THAT will happen. Normally I have to go through them on the site and bold words and center stuff…but now… I'm lost. I hate FF and its confusing-ness.  
3)THIS IS SO SHORT. Sorry. When I write more, I'll post it as the next chapter. Usually, my chapters are 6 pages on paper, 3 typed. This one… isn't even 2 typed… And its just going downhill. I'll try to make the next chapter VERY long, okay?  
And with all of that said, please enjoy the chapter.  


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**

"How long have I been here?"  
"A week." Lacus' voice showed her concern, but I still liked to turn and see it in her eyes. "I've told you that ten times in the past hour Athy." She was the only one that ever used that pet-name for me besides Kira.  
"Oh." I sighed a little. I kept forgetting, it felt like and eternity. "But I thought they said that they were only keeping me for a few days…"  
"yes Athrun." I didn't look to see the eye-roll this time. No point, I figured it was inevitable. To be honest I was simply talking to fill the silence…and we both knew it.

Kira (by some power he felt the need to avoid discussing) was getting better faster than anyone had foreseen, and that made me happy. Still, he was getting out of here later than which made sense since his injuries were a lot more serious.  
"Miss Takato dropped all charges yesterday." Lacus flattened out the pleats in her skirt and smiled to herself. I knew something was going to happen when Lacus Clyne herself decided to…ur…'help' with the various charges and other related things I knew would be facing me once I got out of the hospital, but she was very quick about it…maybe _**too**_ quick.

"Lacus…" My groan made her shift and straighten herself up a bit more in the chair at my side. I _**told **_you not to do anything rash. _**And**_ I said that I would pay whatever fine or anything…"  
"Hush now. All I did was mention your nam-"  
I couldn't stop myself from slightly hissing at her. She knew I hated to use my name to get my way, but she also knew how easy it was. A lot of people here were still Patrick Zala fan-zombies (to my dismay) and would love to treat me like I was him. I guess they were too focused on my father to realize that I had been doing the exact opposite of what he so strongly believed in?

I almost shrugged in response to my thoughts, but caught myself just in time. It wasn't _**unlike**_ me to do something so stupid and absentminded, but I still liked to think it was just the medication that I had just been given (Or was that an hour ago?). Still, nothing could prepare me for the rest of her statement, or what I caught of it at least...  
"-and I think that she might _**really**_ like me."  
"Who?"  
"Cagalli" I actually choked on the air I was inhaling to answer her with, and began a coughing fit. The really dark glare that I received in return would have shut me up, had I not been choking for real. "Fine then." Her face suddenly reminded me of that Pokémon…a Jigglypuff I think… and I started to laugh on top of my coughing – unable to defend myself from her vicious glares. "Be and ass about it. But don't expect any sympathy from me when-…oh never mind." She suddenly got up from the chair and stormed to the door of the room. Trying to stop her, I sat up and weakly called her name through my fit, but she continued to ignore me and reached for the knob.

She didn't have to open it herself, however, as a nurse did the honors for her and walked in with a smile. And then it closed, the 'pink princess' leaving with what I could only assume was a total misunderstanding.  
"And how are we now?" The nurse sounded sickly sweet like she usually did, but it really got to me today. At least it took my mind from Lacus – that, and the pain killers she supplied were the only things that kept me from hating her and that tone. I groaned in response and shrugged and she smiled at me a bit more. "Well, your time here is almost up! Once that medication wears off, I'll be back and we can get a taxi to take you home, okay? Your friend won't be out for another two days, but he's recovering amazingly – you two should consider yourselves lucky!" Despite myself, I nodded and smiled, sitting myself up more on the pillows that lacus had placed behind me….before she hated me I guess. I just didn't get it, why was she so upset?  
….Girls…Impossible to figure out…

I decided that once I got home I would call her over for tea or something (She liked having tea, right?) and talk it over with her, try to apologize for…whatever I did wrong. Signing once again, I let the nurse take her measurements of blood pressure and the like as I closed my eyes. Kira... I wouldn't have long before I saw him again. Every minute that he was away from me, even if it was just in the next room, felt heavy and dragged out, like someone in charge of the time was just doing it out of spite towards me. After all, it was my fault that he was in here. I was stupid…I wasn't thinking, or rather I was thinking too much. The days that had gone by were simply constructed of agony, and it was nothing that the painkillers could fix, unlike my head.

"Everyone makes mistakes, Athrun." His voice had been too soft, too shaky for my liking. He was still scared and still very much in pain. Seeing the bandages up close had made me want to die, although it was a relief to see how much better he was getting even in the week we had been there. "Its not like you meant for us to get hurt right? And the lady in the other car was fine." Always worried about other people first. At least the crash didn't affect his personality. He told me that there would be a lot of scarring, but unlike Yzak, he would get it removed...for me, he had said. For me, so that I wouldn't have to feel guilty whenever I looked at him. He knows me so well that I don't even have to speak anymore, and I suppose that's a good thing because although that would be true, I would never in a million years admit to that.

For right now, as I feel the nurse pull the needles out of my skin and prod the bandages around my head, I know that both of us will live, and that thought calms me down some. After all the years of trying to kill each other in Gundams or with various guns, there was no way I was going to kill him by running a red light.

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**And that's all from me for today~ Please review or just send me your lovely comments as usual. Heaven forbid my readers know that I reply to every. single. one. :D Next chapter to come hopefully soon~**


	8. A small letter to you, from me

Hey you guys! (Are any of you still even there?) So.. I was just reminded about this poor fanfiction that I have sitting here all neglected and such! Oh no! To be honest, I haven't written anything on ff in so long that I almost forget how~!  
I was moving out this month and found the journal that had all of the previous chapters in it :) Unfortunately, nothing new was written and I don't remember enough to just pick up the whole thing where I left off, but I decided to write you a little note saying not to loose hope if you still want this at all :D (And who knows, maybe it'll be good for me to write something NOT meant for school)

So keep on smiling and tell me if you're still out there waiting for this!


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